"What's another word for thesaurus?"
Steven Wright (...more Steven Wright Quotes).

"This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two."
George Burns.

"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire PR officers."
Daniel J. Boorstin.

"Only one man ever understood me, and he didn't understand me."
G.W. Hegel.

"To write a diary every day is like returning to one's own vomit."
Enoch Powell.

"Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet."
Mark Twain (...more Mark Twain Quotes).

"When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read."
Hilliare Belloc.

"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me."
Hunter S. Thompson.

"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
Terry Pratchett.